Slice of Life Archives - Page 10 of 10

Slice of Life: Visits 3/4

I am participating again this year in the Slice of Life challenge in which we write a slice every day in March. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

Tonight was night two of conferences. I love the conversations, I love the opportunity to connect with parents and highlight the individuality of my students. I love the self-reflection that the conversations cause, even when they cause me to question my practices. But most of all, I love the visits.

Every year, without fail, Rigo comes to visit. This young man, who is now an adult, is one of the reasons I keep teaching. When he was in my fifth grade class, I worked hard with him. He was struggling to keep up, he needed encouragement and he needed to strengthen his skills. We worked hard and he knew I cared about his success. The class that he was in was one of those active and challenging groups of kids. I had recently moved up to fifth grade from first grade, and some of those kids sure made me work hard. Rigo played around a bit, but always tried to remove himself from those shenanigans. He had better things to do. He wanted to get an education. He knew that I was going to do everything that I could do to help every one of those students succeed and he worked hard. Then they all moved on to other schools for middle school. For many of my students, this is where my story with them ended. Not so with Rigo.

I look forward each year to checking in with this young man. He started visiting right away in sixth grade. He came to report how he was and what was happening with him. I have heard reports all through middle school and high school, until he graduated last year. It helped that his younger siblings have continued to go to my school so he has come along each year to come say hi. He makes a point to seek me out and say hello.

Tonight, I spoke for fifteen minutes with a kind and polite young man who is working part-time as a security guard and going to community college. He is planning to transfer to a local university and to study criminal justice. He wants to be a firefighter or a police officer. I am so proud of the young man that Rigo has become, and I am happy that he continues to want to share this with me.

I hope every teacher has at least one Rigo in her life to help her remember why she became a teacher.

Slice of Life: Conferences 3/3

Tonight, I had parent teacher conferences. It was really weird for me because I have been out sick from school most of the last two weeks. I will be out again tomorrow. I just made it there for conferences today and will make it there for conferences tomorrow. I don’t love it that my students are having to deal with having a substitute for so much time, but I can’t help it. I hope I will get better soon. Most people are understanding about it. I try not to go into too much detail, but I am straightforward if they ask what is wrong.
I like this time of year because I like talking to parents about their child. I love every one of my students and I like the chance to celebrate each of their accomplishments and to share strategies with parents. I like building relationships with families.
This year, now that I am home from a first night of successful conversations, I am finding myself reflecting on the incredibly ridiculous workload that we face in this era of education. I had some great conversations tonight, but they are tinged with a few questions that make me feel like I need to defend myself. There are so many things that we could be doing right and so many things that most likely need improvement. There are so many people that we answer to and so much that we have to prove. When something has to give, where does that happen? Is it the visible things that matter most or the invisible ones?
Am I doing a perfect job with this group of students this year? No, I am human. But I can promise that I am doing the best job that I can and giving the most of myself that I can give. I think that should be enough. Shouldn’t it?

Slice of Life: Sick Teacher 3/2

I am sick.
I feel unwell.
I miss my students.
I just want to lie here.
I want the medicine to work.
I have to do lesson plans.
I don’t want to give the sub too much to do.
I can’t believe my (un)luck.
I need to rest.
I need to drink plenty of fluids.
I might need surgery.
I wish the antibiotics had kicked it last week.
I am tired all the time.
I have parent conferences this week.
I just want the world to stop for a few days.
I wish I had never heard of Diverticulitis.
I want to whine for a few moments more.
When will it get better?

As I was writing this list, which is shaped like a poem, but not really poetry, I had to smile. It made me think of the poem “Sick” by Shel Silverstein from my all-time favorite poetry anthology, Where the Sidewalk Ends. How I wish it were in that whimsical spirit that I were writing. “What’s that you say? You say today is Saturday? Goodbye, I’m going out to play.” If only.

Slice of Life: Positive Thinking

It has been a long while since I have written on this blog. Coming back here to get started with my Slice of Life challenge, I stumbled across the beginning of a post that was started in August and never finished. It seems appropriate to revise my words and add my perspective at this point in the school year. I am glad for the reminder to celebrate!

I forgot what it feels like to be excited about my job. I have spent the last few years working to make the best of my situation rather than working to have an awesome situation. I worked hard in the last two years to find fun and engaging activities and to inspire readers and writers. I think I did okay at it. I can think of at least five students who started the year hating reading and writing and ended the year loving both. That is success when you are talking about changing mindsets of 8th grade students. The majority of the students became better readers and realized that reading can be fun. My students all wrote novels for NaNoWriMo and maintained blogs. They all figured out how to write better and how to find enjoyment in that writing. These were also successes.
However, I didn’t take the time to celebrate these things. I focused on the negative. The students who continued to fake read and barely write. I let them get to me. I went against my nature and fell down the rabbit hole of excuses for their behaviors. I let myself be influenced into complaining about that which I could not change and not focusing on the good things happening and the ways that I could change some things. This had to do with internal and external factors alike: some toxic influences, a negative pattern in my thoughts, a boss who tended to be negative, etc.

This year, I am surrounded by positive thinking and good attitudes. I am conscious of the need to find celebrations even in the weeks that seem impossible to get through. I have changed my perspective and I enjoy my work again. Part of the issue is the ability to work with the age group that I most enjoy working with. After working at many different levels, I am convinced that every teacher has an age group that is the most natural fit for him/her. Mine is middle grades. I am so much more myself when working with 4th graders than I was when working with 1st graders or with 8th graders. I can be myself and love my students and get hugs and drawings and notes that make me smile. There is so much more energy in my step, and I have so much more energy to give.
Does that make my workplace perfect? No. I still struggle this year with students who are incredibly chatty and some that are just not very nice to their peers. I still have a few students who choose not to be convinced that reading is a good thing to do. I have a lot of students who don’t really know how to be polite…they need my guidance to help them learn what is respectful and what is not. I have a hard time getting through my whole lesson because there is little impulse control in this group and I get interrupted. Every. Single. Lesson. However, my ability to continue to plug away and to try to make this year a great one for my class is directly related to my change in attitude. I have lifted a weight of negativity off my shoulders and this makes it easier to persevere.

The power of positive thinking is mind-blowing and I am so glad I have rediscovered this power.

Slice of Life: Hectic days

Every Tuesday, a number of amazing bloggers write a Slice of Life. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

This school year, I am happier than I have been in a long time. I was given the opportunity to move out of middle school and back into fourth grade. I jumped at the chance. I went into education to be an elementary school teacher. I love being able to teach all the subjects. I love to read, I love to write, I love math, I love science, I love history, I love teaching it all. I also think that there is a definite comfort zone for every teacher. Yes, I am certified to teach grades 1-8, but I am most comfortable with 4th and 5th grade. This year I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I am invigorated and working hard again.

That being said, I have one of those crazy active classes that drive me bonkers some days. I get hugs and pictures to make up for my patience being tried, but I do reach the end of my patience some days. We are working hard to establish a safe and caring environment. We do things in the Responsive Classroom way, we have morning meetings, and we work to be sure everyone is accepted as part of our collaborative community. This is really hard to do when there are a few kids that struggle with empathy. We are getting there. We will get there, we will.

This school year has been especially full of new things for teachers in my district. There is a new student information system and online gradebook to learn to use, a new evaluation system that requires an in-depth plan, and more mandates from the central office than we can keep track of.

I am working hard to plant my two feet firmly on the ground and to get us all on track. It feels like we take two steps forward and one step back. Part of the problem is the ridiculous amount of fabulous ideas out there. Taking a step back and evaluating my goals will go far in helping to make the decisions I must make. It is mighty overwhelming at times, but I know I will succeed in providing what my students need and giving them a classroom in which they can feel safe and loved. It will all work out, it will.

This is a message I need to give myself today because the day was crazy. If I didn’t know any better, I would have sworn there was a full moon today. It must be something else in the air. Now, I need to take a deep breath and repeat to myself: it will work out, it will.

Slice of Life: Meetings 8/5

Every Tuesday, a number of amazing bloggers write a Slice of Life. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

Allow me a few seconds of your time to rant about my last two days. I went to a district meeting with my school team in order to write our school improvement plan. However, the district in its infinite wisdom decided to fill our days with presentations that gave overviews of initiatives that we have been implementing for at least two years. I get that there is a possibility that a lot of schools had not been doing these things, but why do the rest of us have to sit through presentations that do not increase our understanding about anything and suck up the time that we should be spending on analyzing data and writing our plan? It is so frustrating to be there for one thing and to end up actually receiving something far inferior and completely different from what you signed up for. I think our team will come up with a good plan, but we would have been much better served having the time to work on it rather than having to sit through presentations that did not move us forward in our understanding. I know many people bring this up all the time, but why are we expected to differentiate our instruction if the powers that be do not see the need or make the effort to differentiate theirs? AAaaaaannnd, Breathe. Okay, rant over.

Now that I have calmed down a bit, I have started thinking about the way this day affected me. How awful that the people planning this day did not respect our time as educators. How awful that these people did not consider our prior knowledge in their lessons for us. How awful that they did not recognize that there were many different levels of understanding in the room and that some of us were hearing this for the third time. As a learner, I felt powerless and without a voice. I was not engaged and lost a lot of the motivation that I came with. I came to work and expected to be given the opportunity to show what I could do. Unfortunately, the people organizing this event did not give us that opportunity.

This experience served as another reminder to be careful about the power structure in my classroom. When students feel powerless and do not have a voice, they will become disengaged with the lesson. I need to make sure I plan for the many levels of understanding that I have in the classroom, and I need to make sure that students are given enough time to work when there is a task that needs to be accomplished. I also know that I need to make sure I have things organized. Wasting everyone’s time by not being ready to present is so disrespectful.

I will always strive to respect the learners in my classroom by making sure I know about their understandings and working to not waste their time. I hope the next time I go to a district training I am able to feel more engaged and productive.

Slice of Life: Serenity

Every Tuesday, a number of amazing bloggers write a Slice of Life. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

I am not sure about sharing this. I am not sure I want to really document this. I do know that writing this reflection was good for my soul so I will share it and perhaps someone else will benefit from my reflections.

In the last few weeks, I have found myself reciting the serenity prayer. For various reasons, this small bit of supplication to a higher power is quite applicable to my life right now. I am struggling quite a bit with the hand we have been dealt in life. My husband and I are unable to conceive. We have tried a few procedures, but it has been a long time and we are tired of the disappointment. It is not always easy to tell the difference between things you can change and things you cannot change.

SERENITY

In this world of incredible medical advances and technology, there are so many opportunities to keep trying to conceive. There comes a point, though, at which it becomes absurd to continue to spend outrageous amounts of money for the slight chance that it might work. Logically understanding that it is time to stop trying is far removed from accepting the inevitable. I need vast amounts of serenity to accept this one.

COURAGE

What I can do is to live my life in a healthy way and to take care of myself and my husband. We both need to change our diet and lose weight for our health. It takes courage to change our habits, but it is so important for us to live our best life, even if it is a different life from what we had imagined. It takes courage for me to change the direction I saw my life going. It takes courage to keep moving forward.

WISDOM

This one is tricky. It is hard to know when it is time to stop. I understand the reasons for stopping and I am not getting any younger, but it is hard to know that this is the right thing to do. Every fiber of my being has always known since I was very little that I am made to be a mother. Who am I to stand in the way of this destiny? Except it isn’t me standing in the way. It is infertility rearing its ugly head. I am still working on this one. It is hard to know the difference here.

As I have been struggling through all of this in the last few weeks, the serenity prayer has repeatedly popped into my head. It is so interesting how a small bit of text can help you to reflect on almost anything in life. As I work through one of the most difficult things I have had to work through in my life, I find the words comforting and I hope someone is hearing my prayer.

Slice of Life: Storms and Schema

Every Tuesday, a group of bloggers writes a Slice of Life. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

The other day, I was standing in my kitchen making lunch when I heard a BOOM. It wasn’t particularly loud and didn’t last for long. I puzzled about it, and asked my dog what she thought the neighbors were doing. Were they moving something big that had been dropped? Or maybe the train had some freight shift or the construction workers were using a noisy tool. After a few minutes, the sound came again. Now I was starting to get annoyed. So, I took my dog out to the sunny backyard and looked up and down the alley. No one was doing anything that could have been that noisy. Then I heard the sound again and turned around. What I saw was a wall of dark clouds that was quickly descending on us. I had to chuckle. As a midwesterner, I should be ready for quick changes in weather. I was a little embarrassed that it took me so long to figure out. In my head, I apologized to the neighbors for the not-so-nice things I had been thinking about them and all their noise. Then, I started to think about schema.
I have lately been doing a lot of professional reading to get myself ready for a grade level switch this year. One of the books I read is Comprehension Connections by Tanny McGregor. In this book, the author offers a wealth of suggestions about using concrete experiences to help students understand comprehension strategies. I had just read the chapter about schema, so it was fresh on my mind. I thought about how important my schema had been in my initial confusion and eventual comprehension of what was going on. At first, the sun was shining and I had not seen the weather report. I had no idea that there were storms predicted for the day. My schema for sunny days made it possible for me to register that thunder as a different sound. It couldn’t be thunder because it was sunny outside. (Although I have to say, as a Wisconsinite my schema should know better) I was not understanding what was happening because my schema told me something different. Later, when I saw the roll of clouds, the a-ha moment hit me and now I did have schema to place that noise as thunder. I added the new information to my situation and had a new understanding of what was taking place, thus synthesizing and gaining much more comprehension of the situation.
It made me think about how important it is for students to be aware of schema and its role in their comprehension efforts. My schema actually led me astray, and it wasn’t until I linked the new information that I gained understanding. How many times do students pick up a book thinking that they know something about the topic only to find out that they were not quite right? Adding to schema by synthesizing new information and making connections to what we know about the world can help you to understand what you read. I think this could be a good story to share with students to talk about how initial understanding is sometimes erroneous. By adding the new information and rethinking, we can then come to a more complete and accurate understanding of what is happening. Now, every time I am unsure of a big noise, I will be looking at the sky before blaming the neighbors.

Slice of Life: New Adventures

Every Tuesday, a group of bloggers writes a Slice of Life. If you are interested in joining in, visit the Two Writing Teachers blog for more information.

This Spring, I decided that the time had come for me to make a change. I have been thinking about it for a few years now, and the impulse to look for something new just became too strong to ignore. I applied to some new coaching positions within my school district. After being at one school for 14 years, the prospect of learning a whole new set of procedures and rules, and meeting a whole new staff was quite intimidating. However, I took the bull by the horns and kicked my behind into gear and applied.

It turns out that this position was highly sought after and the competition was stiff. This did not bode well for me. You see, I am an introvert. I know in my heart of hearts that I would do an excellent job with this position, yet it is almost cripplingly difficult for me to tell that to a group of strangers. If you stuck me in a workshop or a classroom, you might not know that I am introverted. I am comfortable in those situations. I am the person in the front row, asking questions and participating enthusiastically. I am eager to share my knowledge and to learn from each and every person in the room. But that is a give-and-take situation. Interviews are not. The ability to sell my skills and my knowledge in a relatively short amount of time to strangers is not in my set of expertise.

Going through this process made me think back to my reading of the book Quiet by Susan Cain and her assertion that the world is more comfortable for extroverts and that we actually value characteristics of extroverted behavior more. Certainly this interview process that we have favors the people who can walk into the room and immediately be comfortable among strangers. But does that ability really tell you anything about how well that person will do on a day to day basis? Is my apparently less appealing personality really less appealing? Give me some time to get to know people and you would see that anxiety disappear. Ask anyone who has known me for years and worked with me side by side. My ability to really think through a problem and to sit back and listen makes me more suited for coaching in a lot of ways.

As I thought more about this issue, I felt it necessary to do some research. While visiting Susan Cain’s website, I came across this article that really resonated with me and I found her Ted Talk from this year. It was a great talk to watch to remember back to all the ideas that had intrigued me so much when I read her book.

Our culture values extroverted behavior and is biased toward extroverts. My interviewing experience highlighted that for me.

I am generally a very confident person. The experience of entering interviews and trying to sell myself to the committees really knocked me down a few notches. I did not have any success with the process and felt disappointed and disillusioned. I have since stood up and dusted off my ego and accepted the fact that this was not in the cards for me this year. What I know for sure now is that I want to revisit Quiet and think about the ways that Cain proposes to harness the quiet strength of being an introvert. I need to find the power within me to promote positive change and to find the inner extrovert when it is necessary.

P.S. Everything actually worked out for me for the better. One of my colleagues handed in her retirement papers shortly after the interview cycles were complete. I was able to move out of the middle school position back to a 4th grade classroom. I am so excited about this move! My years teaching 4th and 5th grade were the best ones in my career so far and I can’t wait to work at this level again!